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Thanks everyone for your responses & support on my ‘candy’ journal yesterday. Well, thank you for the same on my other journals too. Hey, thank you, period. Exclamation point. Heart emoji’s. Hugs.
I want to share ‘rest of the story’ behind that candy.
On the surface, yeah, I think a tiny part of me (although, let's face it, there aren't really any parts of me that are tiny) was (yet again) peeved that he (and every other person in my life who continues to gift me candy these days) doesn't, hasn't, won't seem to acknowledge my weight loss & change in appearance with any sense of self ownership aka 'hmmm, something around here has changed, perhaps the gifting needs to be modified.'
After all, cash, gold & silver always fit and are gluten free, right?
But, at the end of the day, I didn't trash the candy. I'll re-gift it to the next person who crosses my path who wants it.
And finally regarding the joke about - 'maybe he was trying to get me drunk?' ... this gift came from someone who's shown interest in me off & on throughout the years but nothing ever materialized out of it.
However, he (along with this 'gift') made a point to show me the photo of his latest 'girlfriend' yesterday. So, double whammy.
Now, nothing ever happened between us because we're friends. Although he has proven he would do anything for me (except not give me candy) we’re 'just not into each other'.
However, dangit, I won't deny my feminine DNA ruffled a bit at his 'sharing' because, hey, I am still a girl with feelings.
So although I held a smile on my face and heard myself say things like, ‘oh, wonderful,’ and, ‘good for you!’, I felt oddly rejected thanks to those XX chromosomes.
And I struggled with some irrational snacking last night in reaction. Nothing too damaging. But the intuition to manage my emotions with food was still present. And it manifested into being awake at 2 am to work on an ‘arrowhead’ quilt pattern.
So now? Well, back in November I purchased tickets to Jeanne Robertson at the Winspear in Dallas for the end of February (because, she sells out fast & I wanted nice seats) after he mentioned he really liked her humor.
So I either need to be an extremely gracious ‘loser’ and gift him the tickets to take her. OR I should be petty enough to sell him the tickets.
But that’s six weeks away so for now I need to go find something else to do with these thoughts.
Thanks for reading this far.
다이어트 캘린더 보기, 2020년 01월 9일:
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2525 kcal
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지방: 140.59g | 단백질: 165.37g | 탄수화물: 145.27g.
아침 식사: Coffee-Mate Sugar Free French Vanilla Liquid Coffee Creamer, Cream (Half & Half), Coffee. 점심 식사: KeVita Master Brew Kombucha - Ginger, Publix Jumbo Eggs, King Oscar Smoked Kippered Herring, Hellmann's Real Mayonnaise, Great Value Sharp Cheddar Cheese, Just the Cheese Grilled Cheese Crunchy Baked Cheese. 저녁 식사: Pictsweet Vegetables For Roasting Red Potatoes & Onions, Mushrooms , Land O'Lakes Salted Butter, Chicken Thigh (Skin Eaten), Fresh Express Organic Baby Spinach, Nature's Place Boneless Skinless Chicken Breast. 간식/기타: Orchard Valley Harvest Chocolate Raisin Nut Trail Mix (28g), The GFB Coconut & Cashew, Hershey's Mr. Goodbar Miniatures, Reese's Miniature Peanut Butter Cups (3). 더보기
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25중 1에서 20
 댓글
Lol funny how we are... I feel like we had this convo in a dream. Old me...when rational and not hormonal everything is fine, I don’t want him and it’s ok for him to want me... but the moment he is with someone else logic goes out the window. I didn’t want him but he’s not allowed to have anyone else. 🤣😂😅lol I think the healthy lifestyle balances me. He’s not for me and I‘m not for him, and I’m truly happy that he found someone compatible.
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: moopie321
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It did remind me of old me, I smiled reading this.
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: moopie321
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I just found this follow-up. That’s, well, that’s annoying with the combo. For what it’s worth, don’t put yourself out too much to buy tickets to shows for people who only have scant interest in really caring for you. Have him pay you for the tickets and he can take his new lady. Or don’t listen to me bc I’m a misanthrope with few friends. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: adultosaur
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Can you go with someone else? Why offer him the tickets at all.
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: Fritzy 22
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2020년 01월 9일 작성이: tatauu22
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Another Wow! So, just wondering why is he your friend? What does he offer in the form of true friendship? I get that not everyone can fill all the friendship spaces, but knowing what he does provide, helps when deciding how to deal with him. 😊
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Real talk. It sounds like you know that he is not into you but you seem to have feelings. You need to decide to either cut off all contact if you can't hear about his relationships. A real friend roots for their friends to find happiness. If you can't do that, because you have feelings, you can't be friends without hurting yourself. This is sabotaging your happiness. Hope you can take the action that will be best for you mentally! Personally, I would go to see Jeanne - she is hilarious.
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: jamruiz
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6 weeks is a long time. Wait 4 before offering to sell them to him. Perhaps he will be a free man and you can take him (as a friend or otherwise).
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: peeperjj
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2020년 01월 9일 작성이: davidsprincess
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You should be direct with him and ask him if he is still going to the event with you, because if he is not you are going to look for someone else to go. You going to the concert and social activities are not dependent on him. Do not beat around the bush; waiting will cause you anxiety and you will be more likely to comfort yourself with food. Be proactive. You are in control!
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: juliefranke
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Go with a another friend and have a blast!
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: Erquiaga
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Does he know you got those tickets? Is it possible to just be friends? I do not know. I have made dumb decisions in the past thinking friends with some guys was possible. Also, I think that more mature guys sometimes think that women our age are desperate and therefore somewhat "easy"...
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SELL the tickets if you aren't treating yourself, Bells, bc YOU are worthy. Also, ALWAYS regift, recycle, repurpose, reuse, etc....NEVER trash bc someone's trash MAY BE someone else's treasure 🤙
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: acomandr
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I'm sorry you lost your friend, even though he gave you candy!
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: erikahollister
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I wish I were close enough, I would LOVE to see Jeanne Robertson, I think she's so funny. If I were you I wouldn't give or sell those tickets, I'd find someone else to go to the show with me. Laughter is good for the soul.
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: shirfleur 1
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Sounds like a perfect "girls night out" opportunity. Forget waiting to see what happens with Mr. Male Friend. Go have a blast with one of your girlfriends! :0)
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: binkytexas
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Ahhh..there is more to your story...I was wondering..
Even though we haven't met in person I think the world of you. You always encourage me. I love your sense of humor as well. You are deserving of a person who will make you feel special. God has someone in mind for you.💜
I do agree with others who said to go out with a friend and enjoy yourself. And get all dressed up and be proud of your beautiful self!💜
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: Diana 1234
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I say keep the tickets and find someone else to take. Anybody you can man woman or child doesn't matter who as long as BELLA gets to go have fun!
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: Ma Ka 71
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I agree with Ma Ka, binky and Diana: go with another friend.
2020년 01월 9일 작성이: metamora
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At the end of the day, I'm not into him .. Moopie hit it on the head .. it was an irrational 'wait, what, hormones!' reaction. I'm actually worried FOR him because he explained it as 'it's one of those you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours type relationships' so it's obviously conditional. He's been my dear, dear friend for decades and I could call him and he'd be here for anything I need with or without the girlfriend. I told him in December about buying the tickets but I didn't bring it up the other day.
2020년 01월 10일 작성이: FullaBella
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